01:07 & 09.10.03
Block on lock, the trunk's stayin locked...

So J just wants to be my friend. We kinda sorta talked about it today during lunch and he basically said that he sees me only as a friend. That is kinda odd since I don't usually fool around with my friends...and it's just kinda weird that he wants to be my friend AFTER we have an awesome night together. Maybe it wasn't an awesome night to him or something, maybe it wasn't that good to him as it was to me. Who knows!

It's just really hard to hang out with him all the time. I just feel so compelled when I'm around him. I am so attracted to him and it's just hard not to just fall...he has that look in his eyes that he's interested, but I guess that look is just universal with him or something. He just has that really cute look and I just wanna keep staring in his eyes. I also give him that look that I ONLY give with people I like, lol. It's like this little head tilt and I kinda look up and look all innocent. I have practiced this look and it usually works! But hell, this guy is hard to break.

I just don't know anymore. I need to get him out of my head and not make it so obvious that I want him. Maybe he's not attracted to the types that throw themselves all over him. We might be having a get together at Wes' Friday night and I'm scared to see how that is gonna go! J is expecting a lot of people there, but I highly doubt there will be. I think we're just gonna chill at Wes' and drink or something. Who the fuck knows!

I just know I need to get over J before I let this loneliness overtake me. I need to focus on having fun and not wanting to constantly have fun WITH someone...if you catch my drift.

I am glad this week is going by fast though, the sooner I get my three day weekend, the better!! WOO HOO!!

Cannot freakin WAIT for Kill Bill to come out!! Too excited for that!!

forget the past <----> there is no future