12:29 & 09.02.04
I'll fly with you...

OK so usually I don't write in my diary for awhile because of two things: 1.) Busy with work 2.) I now have a boyfriend.

Can you guess which one?? I'll give you a hint, it's NOT Number one!! Yes, it is official, I have a boyfriend. We became official Saturday night when I was piss drunk and I asked him if I could call him my boyfriend and he smiled and said yes. I met him online and he was one of the four guys I was talking about in a previous entry. He's been spending the night a lot over here and it has been so nice. We are taking it slow too so we haven't really done anything sexual...yet. The most we have done is make out and he is extraordinary at that because of one thing...a tongue ring! I LOVE guys with tongue rings and I have no clue why. It just feels sooo cool to kiss them. He loves kissing almost as much as I do too, one day he wouldn't let me stop kissing him because I had to go to work. He pushing my head forward making me kiss him more and more. It was soooo cute.

It feels weird calling someone my boyfriend. It kind of scared me Sunday morning when I realized that we were official. I know we're not married or anything, but I kind of had that "ball and chain" feeling. This is what I have wanted for so long, but there's a part of me that wonders if I'm ready for a relationship...I'm not taking things serious with this one. We still have a lot to know about each other. I haven't met any of his friends and there's still little things about him I don't know. We are just going to take things slow and see what happens. I do know I like him and care for him a lot and he is one of the best damn cuddlers I have ever known!

Saturday night I was so drunk and it didn't take me a lot AT ALL to get to that point. I think my tolerance has lowered since I haven't been drinking EVERY weekend. All I had Sat was three shots of 99 Bananas, and two Cosmos. I was sitting in my bf's lap making out with him pretty much the whole night when we went to the club with some friends. I was sooooo horny that night and I tried to convince him to spend the night, but he had to be at work early the next morning, so he left me there all alone. In my drunken stupor and crazy horniness...I IMed Mike of all people and told him to stop by my room...he wouldn't be dissapointed. I told him my door was unlocked. I woke up the next morning wondering why the hell I did that. He didn't show up thankfully but what if he had?? Would I have been stupid enough to sleep with him again after just becoming official with someone??

I'm scared I'm going to do something stupid. I'm still kinda talking to someone else and I don't know where it's going to go with him!!

I had a scary dream last night too. I dreamed I got stationed somewhere else, but me and my bf were still together. He was going to be visiting me the very next day, but I met someone that night and I was contemplating cheating!! How horrible is that???

OH the humanity! Hormones are a bad thing and temptation is a bitch! Should I have a boyfriend if I'm not completely sure I will be faithful?

forget the past <----> there is no future